Newness.

Sooo, these past few days have been amazing! Nothing has really happened, but I feel pretty dang great! 


Today I taught my primary class--I just love them:) Those kids are so amazing and they are so SMART! They have the sweetest little spirits, and their faith is just so amazing to me. I learn so much from them all of the time. They are the CTR7 class, so it's really neat so see how they act preparing to get baptized and after they are baptized. Such great little examples! 


On a really random note, I messed with the set-up of my blog and added some new music. I had to throw some Beach Boys in there. Some of the songs are happier, some empowering, some sad. I'm a girl, I have my moments. These songs are all some of my favorites. Anyways, I changed the format to only show 3 posts at a time, so if you want to turn the music off or pick a different song you don't have to scroll down so far. You can access all old posts by clicking "Older Posts" at the bottom of the page or you can find the archive of all posts by date on the left hand side. 


Feel free to leave me comments or ask questions that I will answer in my next blog post. These questions can be serious, silly, simple, or complex. I'll answer any of them, so ask away! I also changed the "impressions" that you can choose. I only put "inspired to do stupid things" and "I'm offended" intentionally. By the way, if you mark "I'm offended" I won't take you seriously. And if you are serious, well that's just too dang bad for you, isn't it? Nothing's changing on your account.


Anyways, that's all for today!

To My Husband (4)

Love,


I decided that for you, I will implement a new idea in my life, semi-inspired by Sarah Chambers and Erin Gillie (two of the most cheerful, optimistic and amazing girls I know!). I have decided that every morning I am going to list off 5 different reasons that I am grateful for that day. Then, at the end of the night, I am going to list off 5 more things that made my day awesome. 


I have a very negative attitude, but I don't want to burden you down with it, and I certainly don't want our children to have a bad outlook on life. This is going to be a very hard thing for me to do, because I am not a very optimistic person. I very rarely see any silver lining in the clouds. I realize that this needs to change for several reasons. I am going to list off all ten of these reasons since it is the middle of the day.


1. I am grateful that I was going to get to teach primary today.
2. I am grateful that I was healthy and feeling well.
3. I am grateful that I woke up without any negative feelings.
4. I am grateful that I was going to get to attend church.
5. I am grateful that I was able to wake up in a warm, comfortable bed.


1. Today was awesome because I have the best kids in primary ever.
2. Today was awesome because I learned "where love is, there God is also."
3. Today was awesome because I was able to talk to some very helpful friends.
4. Today was awesome because I got to hear a couple conversion stories that strengthened my testimony.
5. Today was awesome because I realized that I can still talk to you about whatever I want and you have to love me, because by the time you ever read this it will (hopefully!) be too late! Haha.


Things have been crazy lately. I've been trying to sort through a lot, and I think I'm finally starting to see how. A lot of it I need to do on my own, and some people don't understand that. It's not that I don't want help--I'd love it. But the things that I worry about are things that I need to work through on my own, or I'll never truly handle the issues. I don't know. But I'm doing this for you AND I'm doing this for me. 


I love you. Sorry to keep you waiting. 


Love, 
Your Future Wife

=/

The phrase "try not to make anyone hate themselves and scream at a wall before dinner" makes a lot more sense now. Well. It doesn't make a lot more sense, but I understand why I was told that now. I really understand. Good thing I answered with, "no promises" as a joke, because it should have been my serious answer. I'm not a very nice person. Or happy person, for that matter. Or whatever. I can be really pessimistic. Which works out okay, because you're "always either proven right or pleasantly surprised."

I have also realized that I am a very self-depreciating kind of person. This spouts from several things, I know, but I have been told quite a bit that I don't give myself enough credit. I think I do, but apparently not. I also have a tendency to push people away for "their own good." It goes along with the screaming at the wall thing. Believe me when I say if I ever push you away, I'm doing you a very big favor.

And this has nothing to do with my recent break up. I was just thinking about it for other reasons.

On a different note, I taught some classes for YW today. There is a video about Emma Smith that makes me cry every time. So here it is, for your own tear-jerking displeasure. 

Also random, thank you to my far too patient friends. I don't know how I'd survive without you--seriously.