BLAH

My life is far too complicated.

I am doing my very best to uncomplicate it, and I don't even think uncomplicate is a word. 

Happiness and misery should be separate, not caused by the same thing, right? Or am I just not "man enough" to push through the bad because there is something great? Sometimes I have no idea. I stop and I look around, wondering how on earth I got to where I am now. Not all of it is bad. There are things in my life that I am very grateful for, but there are other things that I don't know how to even begin to deal with. So I close my eyes and try not to think about them, because thinking about them hurts. And thinking about them keeps things complicated.

I often tell myself that there are a lot of things that I shouldn't worry about. I wonder if they are things that I really should worry about, and that I am just ignoring them because I am too weak or too gutless to actually face my problems, even if they are small ones. 

This is what is on my mind today. I guess all I can do is suck it up, pray hard, keep on moving, hope for the best, and breathe deeply (from my abdomen).